Monday, 15 March 2010
swallow me whole
I was going to write about something else that was bugging me but I still can't get over what happened today.
Today I had a moment that everyone has had - that single moment where you wish the earth would just open up and swallow you whole.
Today's moment was mailing a reply to a HR person about a future job movement and not realising it was a 'reply to all' - which included all other people at my grade! There was that strange moment of uncertainty when I doubted myself and felt a disturbance in the air as I clicked 'Send' however I still didn't fully understand until I was immediately inundated with Out Of Office messages by dozens of people and then realisation dawned on me.
Oh how I wanted the earth to just open up and take me and the entire building with it!
Of course, after the initial hot flush of excruciating embarrassment, you then go through anger - aimed at yourself. I spent the next few minutes sighing and berating myself for not checking properly or just clicking things too quickly.
This didn't last long as I reverted to embarrassment as friends messaged me about my error and had a laugh at my expense - I don't blame them as that would be what I'd do in their shoes!
Of course, this moment suddenly reminded me of the countless other times where I felt the whole world conspired against me to lead to that moment - all those memories you repress and blissfully forget suddenly rushed back like the time I critiqued a painting only to have the artist standing behind me or when I had a Freudian slip whilst talking to a girl!
The obvious answer that comes from all of these moments is to slow down and take some care - but then where's the fun in that?!
If you're brave enough, feel free to share your moment(s)!